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Catholics across Britain were partying in the street today, after David Cameron announced plans to end discrimination the royal household. Under the proposed Royal Equality Act, Catholics will no longer be barred from the throne, and the preference for male heirs will be abolished. Craig O’Brian – who until recently worked for the Department for Work and Pensions in Liverpool - told The Third Estate that his life had been transformed by the announcement. “I’ve been unemployed since the government started making cuts” he said. “It’s so good to know that an alternative way of making a living is now open to me”.
However not all Catholics are happy. The Bishop Of Liverpool believes that these proposals are a diguised attack on the catholic church. “By creating a situation in which one of our flock may end up marrying one of those inbred fucking degenerates, Cameron has delivered a great in the face to the catholic community in Britain.
Meanwhile Royal Equality campaigners are ecstatic that, under the proposed changes, male heirs will no longer come before female heirs in the line of succession. Clare Harrington of the Justice for Princesses campaign hailed the move as a great step forward. “Ever since Princess Anne was a child, she has had to live with the fact that she will only ever be a princess, and never the queen”, Harrington said. “Her life has been that of a modern day Kuntekinte.”
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